The letter from the director of “Crazy Rich Asians” to Coldplay demonstrates a distinctive art of persuasion.
Have you ever really, really wanted something, only for the person with the power to give it to you to say no?
That is the situation Asian American director Jon M. Chu faced. Chu found a song perfectly suited to the ending of his new film— Crazy Rich Asians (Children of Asia's super-rich – the first film in 25 years from a Hollywood studio with an all-Asian cast). That song is Yellow, performed by rock band Coldplay, according to Inc..
In an interview with Quartz, Chu said his colleagues initially feared the song would evoke negative stereotypes. They said, “Oh, we cannot do this. What do you think people will say?” But Chu persuaded them: “Trust me on this,” and they agreed to let him handle it.
But His Biggest Problem Was That Coldplay Refused Chu’s Request to Use the Song Yellow for the film.
You can imagine Chu feeling disappointed and letting his emotions take over. He might tell his colleagues: “Forget what I said. That song isn't all that great.” Or he might try to use his Hollywood connections to somehow persuade Coldplay.
But Chu demonstrated remarkable persuasion by using emotional intelligence. He took time to gather and control his emotions instead of letting them control him. Then he turned those emotions into a powerful story, sharing the song’s profound impact on him.
He shared these feelings in a letter sent directly to Coldplay.
‘I know this sounds rather strange, but throughout my life I have had a complicated relationship with the color yellow. From having the word hurled at me as an insult at school to watching films in which many people were called “yellow cowards,” yellow carried a negative meaning throughout my life. Then I heard your song… For the first time in my life, yellow was described in the most beautiful and wondrous ways I had ever heard: the color of the stars, the color of the girl's skin, the color of her love. It was an extraordinarily compelling and passionate image that made me reconsider my own self-image…’
An hour after the letter was sent, Coldplay replied to director Chu, agreeing to let him use the song Yellow for the film Crazy Rich Asians, according to Quartz. The song was then featured at the film's climax, performed in Mandarin by singer Katherine Ho.
The lesson in persuasion here is this: the next time you face disappointment because someone has the power to deny you what you want, pause to gather your emotions. Then try to channel those emotions into a positive force.
This process not only helps you get what you want but also understand much more about yourself.
Collected.
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